This story is called, "The Transformation of Cluntiqua, the Virtual Fairy Hag"
Characters in this story:
Cluntiqua, the Virtual Fairy Hag
Dark Dirkion, the Hag’s companion
Leperchaun: the demented troll belonging to the Hag
The Two Troll Brothers: helpers of the Leperchaun
Toadstool Sprite: the light and lively spirit who
humors the Hag when playing her nasty virtual reality games
The Wizzler: a Celtic Woods king who directs the evil dynamics of the game-playing to and through Cluntiqua, the Hag
The Mocking Jester: the character who eggs on the evil doings of the Hag, making her think that all worth (in life) is fun and games
Colorful Entourage of Ragamuffins: the Hag’s virtual reality human friends
Paraclete/Creator: the “beggar”, Paraclete, is the nice old man who pleads with and warns the Hag of impending doom; the Creator represents God’s voice speaking to the Hag
Shadow of Things to Come: dark spirit showing Cluntiqua the reality of her impending doom
Dame Victoria: The queen who becomes Cluntiqua’s unsuspecting target, caught in a kingdom called Clever Listlings
Sweet Clover Woodsflower: The ginger-orange haired maiden that Cluntiqua could be if she would but repent for her foolish pranks and wicked thoughtless controls
***************** There was once upon a time not so long ago an evil deranged hag named Cluntiqua. She lived in a somewhat modest castle within the boundaries of a land resting between the gap of heaven and hell. In fact, the name for this place where the hag Cluntiqua dwelt was called the “Cleft of Foolish Limbo.” Here, all creatures were locked in a perpetual sate of limbo. Now in this sate of limbo, the creatures appeared to be doing many things; yet whenupon looking very closely at their doings, you may see that they really are doing nothing at all. Of course, the villagers busied themselves so that they could look busy. They had nice houses, nice families, and enough gold to meet their needs. However, the work that they attempted to do was just that….an attempt. Nothing good ever solidified. Nothing good ever took root. In fact, even the beautiful foliage of nature all around them seemed to be growing and thriving; but alas! Whenupon admiring the nature--smelling and handling it’s appearance--the life of the nature would just shrivel up and die or pull out right from its roots and wither. Even the village children seemed to be doing good things. They tried to do their school work. They tried to play games with the other village children. However, all their occupied attempts were but an illusion. No fruit came from their efforts. In fact, when I came upon this strange land during my many ventures, I noticed that when the children read the words from a book, the words pulled right off the pages and flew right into the Field of Limbo even before they could reach the eyes of the reader. Whenupon the village children played ball games in their playing field, the ball, upon reaching the goalie would suddenly take flight in the sky and bounce right into….you got it….that dreadful Field of Limbo. I daresay that the Field of Limbo not only stole the fruit of their efforts; this field, controlled by the evil devil king, The Wizzler, even stole away their hopes and dreams. Now of course, The Wizzler, without any subjects to pay him homage in the land, would be nothing at all if the villagers actually beheld him in his true form. For in order for a creature to turn real things into forms of nothingness, he, himself, must be nothing: those elements about him which are perceived of as being real would be, in fact, only a mere illusion, you see. Now, let us laud and behold the one, the only….the great (yeah, right!)…The Wizzler!!!….sitting upon his honorable thrown! Yes, the village people, blinded in their spiritual eyes, see the appearance of a great king before them, endued with honor and wisdom. Sure enough, he promises them a goodly substitute to take the place of real life fulfillment. This substitute, called virtual reality now takes the place of true life as the Creator intended. This counterfeit reality now becomes a world for them that will compensate for the frustrations they feel whenupon pondering the nature of real fulfillment—the kind that is borne through their own wholesome efforts of aspiring to the great things of life—sadly now non existent. Now virtual reality is a very easy world to create; that is to say if you have the right tools and the means to escape into that dwelling cave where no one—including the spirit of real life—can interrupt you or squelch your fun in your efforts at creating this surreal substitute for real life. To make this endeavor even more fun for the hag, Cluntiqua, The Wizzler gave her some friends to aid her in the enjoyment of her games. Her main friend was the whimsical yet demented Leperchaun. He seemed to be the ringleader igniting all the effects he could possibly instigate within the sick places of Cluntiqua’s cobweb mind. Of course, Leperchaun had his helpers too. The Two Troll Brothers were the spies who would fly off to the land of Clever Listlings and spy on the people targeted by the Leperchaun and Clintiliqua’s sick games. These little nasty trolls whispered secrets to Clintiqua’s itching ears, telling her all sorts of inside information that would enable her to critically time her trickery during the victim’s most vulnerable moment Although the cruelest of the schemes were inspired by Leperchaun and his Two Trolls, the fun part of Cluntiqua’s gaming was inspired by the seemingly sweet and innocent Toadstool Sprite. This she-sprite and her little toadstool friends threw lively feeling fairy dust on Cluntiqua whenever she was questioning her behavior and thinking about what real-life living would be like. Their job was to pleasantly distract her from this false thinking and get her back into the nasty business at hand. Little by little, they were causing Cluntiqua to waste her life away in the pleasures of this false reality; in the meantime, Cluntiqua was losing everything important to her life—the real people—the real things of life. But fret no more! The farty fairy dust lavished upon her head was the stuff of feeling that made her feel in control; of feeling important ; of feeling like she was a queen in a kingdom that had to play by her rules; or else, she would smite them with her dastardly Leperchaun games. Of course, in order to keep Cluntiqua in this frame of mind, her friends had to appeal to her imaginations that caused her to alter off from her true core self. Losing more and more the sense of this true core self, Cluntiqua became sicker and sicker and darker and darker in her understanding of what is truly real. Therefore, she now was living in a constant state of virtual reality. In her mind, she was constantly scheming and switching gears in the realm of her identification of life. She had to shut off everything that interfered with this safe other-reality, and let go of everyone and everything that blocked her from this safe place of dementia. After all, they all owe this to her. This, being the reason for her justification, she found herself grid-locked in desperate straits all the more. Now Dark Dirkion (the horned devil whom she later turned into her subservient pet frog), the old hag’s companion, sometimes enjoyed playing the games with Cluntiqua; they two would get off on virtual reality adventures that would sometimes literally knock their socks off! In fact, I once witnessed their socks shoot straight through their cave dwelling and off like a rocket into the core of the atmosphere’s dying stars! Whew! I’m pretty sure no one was caught in the path of their stinky socks! However, I daresay, that some poor unsuspecting fool may have been knocked down simply from the mere wind the stench and fury these socks did emit! Another friend given to Cluntiqua to enhance her virtual life ventures was the Mocking Jester. He was a silly innocent-looking fella who liked to spark interest in Cluntiqua’s need for cruel game-playing witch-haggery. He helped her make up several games that would branch out into vexatious trickeries using fake personalities that did issue from the nasty recesses of Cluntiqua’s shallow mind. Her shallow imaginations, prompted by the likes of her little friends, enabled her to think of new and various cruel ways to seek controls over the citizens inhabiting the land of Clever Listlings. She would send them nasty threatening notes to discourage them from posting; she would appear as a friend to them in order to snag and inconvenience them to the point that (she hoped) they would take leave of their efforts in the Clever Listlings kingdom. Of course, The Mocking Jester whispered in her ear mocking tales about the people so that she would hate them even more. He told her not to care for them and to show no empathy to their needs or personal life situation. This was not so hard to do because Cluntiqua was more and more letting go of her own real feelings for real people in her life. It is no surprise that it was so easy to not care for the people in her idea of their “virtual life.” The Mocking Jester joked and cajoled with Cluntiqua while the Toadstool Sprite lavished her with majic dust that made her feel a state of virtual happiness and success for the controls she was able to demonstrate with the help of her friends. Her friends would even entice her, due to her weak sense of her own core personality, to become so obsessed with the kingdom of Clever Listlings that she constantly lived in the thinking of , “What is the next best scandalous cruel game I can do now?” Now it did seem that Cluntiqua was the real hag queen when it came to making a surreal virtual life that only she could enjoy and of course felt no wrong in making it. For this false reality made her feel like she was in control. She would spend hours upon hours at her limbo machine, led by the lure of control to unsuspecting people who belonged to a kingdom she wanted to rule (although it did not belong to her). This kingdom was called the land of Clever Listlings. In this land, occupied by many village people, one could, through his own choice, offer up his goods for sale, no matter what they be. And a nice forum it was at that, for many people found this to be a great help to the welfare of their family. This forum belonged to all the people. Simply by the designed nature of Clever Listlings, no one is exempt from using its goodness. However, some of the people (like Cluntiqua) who tapped into its goods were foolish game-playing vamps. They somehow thought that they owned this goodly land and didn’t like those they considered vagarious and trifle to enjoy it. Against them, the foolish ghoulies played games of “flagging” and “tagging”. In case you’re wondering how this game is played, picture an old fat gnarly hag (like Cluntiqua) sitting behind this huge touching machine with a picture atop it (sort of like her crystal ball), enabling her to see, monitor, and judge for herself whether the other villagers were making postings that suited her just fine. If they did not,
STAY TUNED FOLKS! MORE OF THE STORY YET TO COME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ]]>
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